How Am I Going To Survive The Summer?

Where is the June gloom? It’s supposed to be foggy and overcast, and us Beach People are supposed to stand around and say things like, “Sure, doesn’t feel like summer, but at least parking isn’t a problem…” But no, it’s still only June and already my apartment is a brick oven. Who were the geniuses in 1924 who thought to build a brick building on the beach?

Even if I was capable of concentrating in my apartment and wasn’t tempted to raid the refrigerator for Trader Joe’s trail mix every five minutes, or make another shot of espresso, and I didn’t live in a neighborhood where every every home owner didn’t insist on a high-powered leaf blower, or having their hard wood floors sanded every other year, or just having someone employed using a tool with a chain-saw-like sound, I would still wilt from heat exhaustion like my poor plants (they looks so sad after hot days).

I suppose I could try to install an air conditioner, but that would probably screw up the feng-shui…so hard living in LA.

Just for today, I’m ready to move inland.

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