Full Moon + PMS = Cray

The moon is full, the lining of my uterus is ready to shed (gross, I know), and I can’t watch five seconds of the Olympics without welling up with tears.  So much for feminism, all I can think about is chocolate, coffee, and how fast can I down some sangria.   I’ve also been having dreams about babies.  (But still no plan to have one).

The other night I dreamt that I gave birth to an actual fully developed 1-year-old in my car while driving on the 5 back to LA from the Bay Area.  I may have pulled over, but there was no mess. Nothing. Just a sudden adorable delicious baby   Later, I happen to run into my mom and I say, “Hey Mom! Look!  You’re a grandmother!”  Shockingly, she simply shruggs her shoulders and mutters, “Meh…” as if I had just presented her with my collection of 80’s jewelry.  Despite her dissappointment, I go on living as a mom with a baby on one arm, shopping, doing errands…when suddenly…Holy Shit! Where did I leave the baby?!

This is why I still have no plans to have a baby.

Just for today, I got me some PMS.

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