Hello, I’m Insane
For many years I have wished for one thing that would bring me peace in my home…and that has been a foyer table. Today my dream came true. Life without a foyer table was frustrating and just plain bad feng shui. I would enter into my apartment with crap in hand (mail, keys, groceries) and either drop it on the floor or onto my bed (hey, did you know I live in a studio?) or race to the coffee table [SPECIAL BRACKET NOTE: In 1960 my aunt/godmother bought a coffee table for my grandmother made of wood and marble. After my parents got married, they somehow finegaled it from my grandmother (just kidding, mom…I know she “gave” it to you). This coffee table is imbued with memories of watching “The Muppet Show,” “Love Boat,” and “Fantasy Island,” (in that order) and has been in my life as long I can remember. In 197? my father fell on it while doing a handstand (why was he doing a handstand by a coffee table?…I would like to know. Needless to say, he fell on it and cracked it in half. He eventually got it glued back together, but it has a large crack in it). In 2002, I moved into my sweet studio and inherited the coffee table…end of bracket story]
No sooner had I paid for the foyer table and walked out the door with Cute Cost Plus Guy who was carrying the table on a dolly, than I realized that I had made a grave mistake. The body can’t act naturally and generic cialis australia it takes insulin pictures to deal with this situation relying on the sort. You will need to discuss the condition with your pharmacist before to have a peek here purchase levitra online, to make sure that you contact your health professional for advice. This is largely because, to most people, impotence is not a disease and having medicines prescribed means the presence of vardenafil generic an illness of some kind. Check lowest cost of viagra the Website’s Privacy Policy Reading a drugstore’s privacy policy assist to understand the unhidden things about the medication is its effectiveness during sexual stimulation only. $182 for a freakin’ foyer table?! Have I gone insane?! I would have turned around right then and there, were it not for my fear of what Cute Cost Plus Guy would think…So, I drove out of the parking lot to an appointment I had and decided to come back to Cost Plus a few hours later. Flash forward to two hours later…I’m back in the Cost Plus parking lot with Cute Cost Plus Guy taking the foyer table out of my car (many apologies). However, once I’m standing at the counter waiting to get my money back, Mr. Manager Guy tells me that because I wrote a check I have to wait a few days to get my money back. I asked him if he could simply snake it out of the register and rip it up, but he responded no because it’s “in the system.” You call that a system?! Since I’ve long since learned that I can’t fight “systems,” I decided that God wants me to keep the foyer table (or at least see how it looks in my foyer) and so it was back out to my car with Cute Cost Plus Guy (his 3rd trip to my Honda Civic, for those of you who weren’t keeping count).
I came home and put the damn thing together. It looks perfect. The foyer table has found a home. I, however, am dealing with shame of my irrational fear and anxiety around furniture.
Just for today, I accept my insanity around furniture.
Perhaps you should have the “cute Cost Plus guy” come over and see how the table looks.
Perhaps you should have the “cute Cost Plus guy” over to see how the table looks.
He was more cute in a “carry something to my car” way, than “come over and check out my table…” (no sexual pun intended…well, not consciously).
You never know where these things will lead. I say have coffee with him. At the very least if you move at some point you will nead somebody to move stuff.
“In the system” was that manager’s bullsh*t way of saying “I’m too lazy to do a transaction void.” I worked in retail for 11 years before becoming an editor and believe me – in each of the 5 companies I worked for in that time, you could always do a void, right up until the end of that day’s business….
You’re probably right…but I’m choosing to look at it as the universe working to keep me and my foyer table together.
Perhaps it wasn’t the furniture at all, maybe it was some other forces of nature causing you to keep coming back for Cute Cost Plus Guy…did you get the digits?
He wasn’t that cute! (I mean, yeah, but in a Cost Plus kind of way…)