Goodbye HBO

Today, I called my cable company and cancelled my HBO. It was a difficult decision and I had to take a moment to grieve this loss. It’s not that I can’t afford it (though, I never say “I can’t afford,” but “I choose not to spend money on BLANK”) and it’s certainly not that I don’t love it. I’m like a walking advertisement for HBO. I thought I was the first one to make up the advertising campaign, “It’s not television, it’s HBO,” because I really mean it.

However, certain things weren’t happening in my life. Two, to be specific, and they both take place in bed after 11:00 pm. Yes, you probably guessed the first one. Reading. I haven’t cracked a book open in the past year-and-a-half since the cable guy came and installed a box a few days after my boyfriend broke up with me. Now there’s a lot of information on how you can contact a certified Chiropractor Bend Oregon? This spe cialis generic canadat could be the key towards managing your stress effectively and achieving optimum health. While he’s an efficient scorer once he steps foot in the paint, Irving – like many young players – has a tendency to get free viagra force shots. It can address different sexual health issues in men like ED, PE, low vitality and low sperm count, or worse no sperm at all. cialis no prescription why not find out more It blocks the blood viagra ordination flow and increases the higher chances of suffering from impotence than another man in his 40’s. I wept in gratitude knowing that my evenings would soon be filled with high-quality distraction from the heart-wrenching pain of ending a relationship. And I was right. Instead of confronting the deep loneliness of solitude, all I had to do was hit a button, and the next two hours were spent in a coma-like haze of half-consciousness while I surfed snippets of “Enterouge,” “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” “Ponrnucopia,” and the occassional 80’s hit (“Pretty in Pink,” “Indescent Proposal,” and “Pretty in Pink” (I love the scene where Molly “Andy” Ringwald doesn’t want Andrew “Blane” McCarthy to drop her off at her house because she doesn’t want him to “see where she lives”… I felt similarly in high school, though, I KNOW, Mom, that we weren’t that poor and our house was very, very cute). Sure, I can now lip synch whole scenes from “Pretty in Pink,” recite every ringer by Johnny Drama, and I know that porn is a niche market, but my grammar and spelling (in case you haven’t noticed) has started to deteriorate (actually, that’s a total lie…I’m just very lazy), not to mention my attention span (I had a huge crush on Andrew McCarthy when I was ten…did I pay my car insurance?). I was beginning to get all crack-addict-y about it (if this verbiage doesn’t make my point clear, I don’t know what will), lying awake at 2:00 am to watch the ending of “Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead” despite having seen it five times and never once enjoying it. Sure, there’s “Real Time with Bill Maher” (he rocks) and the occasional educational documentary (“When the Levees Broke”), but for all the programming that nurtured my mind, there were fifty bad movies I couldn’t seem to turn off or that I had watched only the middle portion of ten times (I don’t think I once saw a movie from start to finish).

Then there’s reason Numero Dos. A friend told me that in India the government is planning on giving away TV’s to control population growth. There’s got to be some reverse correlation between television viewing and sexual activity…need I say more?

Just for today, I can say goodby to HBO.