A Hair Dryer Away

I went to Target to buy a new hair dryer yesterday. I purchased my old, now broken hair dryer with my mom at a different Target six months before she died. She wasn’t feeling great, but came with me in order to get out of the house.  Sometimes needing a hair dryer can be just what the moment needs. If you measure time in hair dryers, she has been gone for a full hair dryer cycle.

She has also been gone for two full Mac lipliners.  Two lipliners ago, we stopped into the MAC store after getting capuccino at Peet’s coffee on 4th street in Berkeley.  She liked an afternoon capuccino and Peet’s Coffee was her favorite. She lived above the original Peet’s on Shattuck in college and the real Peet served her his brew. We once barged in on the dentist office that now occupies the space. They were patient as she described what her room once looked like that now housed a dental chair and a guy with a fluid vacuum in his mouth.

She approved of my lipliner purchase because “lips lose definition with age.” I got mad and asked, “Are you saying I have undefined lips?” . Then she got mad that I got mad because I “misinterpret everything,” and I don’t remember what happened next but we were probably silent for a while and then walked over to Anthropologie where she complained that everything is too expensive (it is).
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I remember I used that MAC lipliner down to the stub because I didn’t want to think she had been gone for a whole lipliner life cycle.  I haven’t counted, but she has probably been gone for dozens of hair cuts, deoderant sticks, shower curtain liners…for some reason toiletries and appliances seem more important markers of time than a year.

The hardest time is something happens: good or bad. There is nobody to call, no substitute for your mother.  Even if she tells me that my lips need definition.

Hug your mother today! Happy Mother’s Day!